I have recently undergone some pretty significant life changes, and while I have no idea where my life will be a year from now I feel God has given me a glimpse of the plan he has for me. A week ago, I started writing this blog for my kids to read at some point down the road. I'm hoping it's a LONG way down the road but nonetheless I feel more sure than ever before about life itself being one giant learning experience - and how God has intended it to be that way.
Having had many children, and having found someone to share my life with have been the two biggest blessings throughout my years. Each of those blessings have taught me so many lessons themselves. The most important lecture I've gotten from God has been really recent: Live life. I haven't always done that throughout many of my mid-thirty-something-ish years...
It's really that simple, but it's not very easy. I've forgotten to live life so many times, and I'm sure everyone else has too. I forget often on Mondays when the whole week is staring me down. There's too much on my plate those days to take a few minutes just to live. Mostly weekends is what I've always saved for living... but then dishes and laundry and a bedroom that seems to be the catch-all for anything and everything needs to be cleaned. I peek into any of the kids bedrooms and drop what I'm doing to lecture THEM on the importance of cleanliness... and another project takes precedence over living.
The baby stage passed last month with the celebration of a 1st birthday... and I have just 6 months before the teenage years (and HORMONES) invade our home. Add to that several stages scattered between those, and life is "happening" all around within our walls. I just hadn't bothered to take any time to live it myself.
So I stopped. Well, more correctly, God made me stop. Should I say he allowed for me to stop? I think that sums it up much more accurately. He allowed for me to pause here and to LIVE in what is happening around me. I can't control so many things - and as a Mom, that is my initial instinct. I want to handle this. I want to schedule this. I want to plan for next week and for two weeks later. But I can't. It's funny because even before, I never could. None of us can. We lull ourselves into such a false comfort zone where we feel we're in control - and we believe we can schedule time for later to do those things we want. We can LIVE later on. Work now.
And, well... it's not like that. Boy was I wrong.
So - to anyone listening - and especially to those of you I am writing this for - please LIVE today. Years (I hope) down the road, when you kids read this, I hope you Live. I hope you realize how easily life can turn on a dime. I hope you enjoy the moments you are alone - and enjoy - TRULY enjoy the moments after your children are born. I hope you awaken to nurse them at 2am and truly know how quickly that time will pass. I hope you feel - and I hope you learn & grow from those feelings. I hope you know that you are on Gods plan - and only He knows your days.
I love you all so much today! My heart is full for you!
Mom, Me, Yours